Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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