Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
