Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
