Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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