i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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