nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize