It's Friday. Sex?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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