Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
