How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I understand Curling. That high.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Randomize
