next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
