Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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