Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
