Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I smell like Dick and happiness
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
