He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
