She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I could fuck to npr.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
