the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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