Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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