Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm always down for nudity.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
