i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
