"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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