We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize