Kiss
Puke
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
either way he was missing a nipple.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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