Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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