So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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