walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
