2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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