U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
