Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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