she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
