This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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