She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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