Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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