I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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