its not stalking. its research.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
