Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
