Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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