You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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