I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
