Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
not ubering you a puppy
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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