you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
