I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
