Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
