he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
