So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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