if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
