My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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