I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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