god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
