Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
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