i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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